"If you can't find a friend, make one."

Let's face it: people suck.

Don't get me wrong. Everyone has their good qualities.

For example, someone might have an obnoxious laugh, but maybe the way their flesh burns is interesting. As the heat sets off glowing embers in their hairs and their skin blackens just before it starts to glow red along the lines where it breaks apart, then FWOOMPH! Fat spatters and crackles. Sinew and muscle dissolve in flame as the meat falls from the bones.

What's not to like about that?

This week's Thursday Thriller is May.

This 2002 Lucky McKee film is about a veterinary assistant named May (Angela Bettis), who never had any friends because of her lazy eye because people suck. When May was a little girl her mom gave her a homemade doll to be her friend, but wouldn't allow her to take it out of the glass case because May's mom sucks. May kept the doll well into adulthood, and talked to it every day. The doll silently expresses some jealousy when May tells it that she wants to make a new friend, a man named Adam (Jeremy Sisto) who works at an auto body shop. May thinks his hands are beautiful. May and Adam try dating for a while, but ultimately, he breaks her heart because people suck.

Lonely, May runs to the arms of Polly (Anna Faris), the lesbian receptionist at work whose neck she admires. Because people suck, Polly breaks May's heart as well.

After that May tries to scratch her itch for human interaction by volunteering to work with blind children In a curious move, she takes the doll in one day to show the blind kids, and because people suck, they tear it out of her hands and the case smashes all over the floor. The real fun starts when the kids try to crawl around in the floor and find the doll and learn the hard way that broken glass is hard on the hands and knees.

So May gives up on people and decides her best solution is to make a new friend out of the parts she likes about people.

May is a good movie about a weird girl. It streams on Shudder.